Keep Attribution Simple,” He…
retorted, uttered, commented, cried, dared, voiced,
barked, returned, greeted, demanded, snapped,
observed, and muttered—but…
Seldom Said.
By eliminating excessive synonyms for “said” from
your writing, you can unlock the door to clearer prose,
stronger characters, and more narrative power.
Louis E. Catron © 2002, Louis E. Catron
I've copied the above quote here because it says it it better than I could.
Lately I've begun to read books where the almost
immediate turn-off for me has been the overuse of attributes and dialogue tags.
Some have been absolute shockers, with pages peppered with he said, she said,
murmured, giggled, guffawed, dribbled, titters - well, you get my drift. I'm
sure. Whenever I read one of these attributes, my mind instantly goes to the action
suggested by the verb and away from the story as I try to picture how someone
speaks and titters, for example, at the same time. Surely in this instance titter
is not the action of the words.
Another issue for me is the overkill of combining font type,
punctuation and dialogue tags.
Example:
‘GET OUT!!!’ she yelled.
I have seen books where page after page of dialogue has been
interspersed with writing that is virtually screamed at the reader. Not only is
this off putting, after all no one likes to be yelled at, it also detracts from
the all-important aesthetics of the publication. Unless you are telling, rather
than showing the action, the reader would know from the preceding action or dialogue
to expect the words to be screamed, however, if you must use upper case, there
is no need to add an exclamation mark – yet alone multiples of these. You don’t
want to deafen the reader, do you? The better your dialogue, the less need
there will be to use devices such as this to convey what is happening.
Without convincing dialogue, readers can quickly lose
interest as such inclusions often distract from the essence of the story,
however, when done well, dialogue can advance the story at manageable pace as
well as providing insights into the central characters. Used properly, it is an
excellent technique for breaking up action scenes or long narrative and/or descriptive
passages.
Writing realistic dialogue that reads like 'real' people
talking can be one of the most difficult aspects of the creative writing
process for some writers and I suggest observing how people talk to one another
in real-life situations (listen in the conversations in waiting rooms,
restaurants etc) and then strive to create dialogue that sounds like everyday
conversations that reflects an honest interchange between key characters based
upon the nature of the situation.
Ideally, dialogue should convey something new to the reader,
something that contributes to mounting the suspense of the story, eliciting an
emotional response or revealing some hidden components. However, there is no
need to put everything into your dialogue constructions as this may make the
conversations overly heavy and complex as opposed to simple and
straightforward.
If a character is well-rounded (in the literary sense) the
reader will intuitively ‘know’ their habits, behaviours and voice and, should
the writer wish to include other pieces of information, this can be told within
a narrative or reiterated with another character's point of view or quote.
Avoid having one character use another character’s name to
establish identity, as people almost never say other people’s names back to
them in general conversation.
Be wary of gratuitous use of expletives, slang etc. While slang
or inflammatory comments may, on occasion, make your writing seem authentic and
alive, avoid an excess of such dialogue as the writing may then come across as 'trying too hard' which will
cause you to lose credibility with your readers.
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When I first started to write I thought you had to tell everyone what was happening, and so what was described in the quote was the wayI wrote. It was hard to find another way of saying: said. After one of your sessions on the subject you opened up a whole new understanding for me, and words hit the page much easier.
ReplyDeleteIt took a while to grasp the function of show not tell, but now it has become a habit.
I have recently read a regency romance, it is a first novel where the author has been duped by her publisher and they look to have printed the manuscript without a hard copyedit . The book is terrible. A good story poorly presented.
For more about that, go to http://wurugi.blogspot.com.au
Thanks for this informative piece Merlene.